Emily (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
iluvroadrunner6) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
fandomweekly2019-06-03 11:09 am
iluvroadrunner6) wrote in fandomweekly2019-06-03 11:09 am
Entry tags:
[#016] All I Wanted Was to Break Your Walls (XMCU/Doom Patrol)
Theme Prompt: #016 – Fourth Wall
Title: All I Wanted Was to Break Your Walls
Fandom: XMCU/Doom Patrol
Rating/Warnings: R // Spoilers for the end of Doom Patrol and warnings for Deadpool being … Deadpool, and language. Lots and lots of language.
Bonus: Yes, x2, God help me. This is what happens when you binge an entire show of crazy in one weekend.
Word Count: 914
Summary: Emily puts two fourth wall breaking characters in the same fic and tries to see if the world explodes. She definitely loses a chunk of her word count to unnecessarily appropriate coding, if nothing else.
And here we are, once again.
The heroes, in their desperate ineptitude, have come up against their arch nemesis, Mr. Nobody. Despite their inevitably lucky escape from his wrath at their last meeting –
“Escape?” Rita looks offended by the proposition as she stands in the middle of the construction zone. “We worked together, you unbelievable prick.”
– No interruptions from the peanut gallery, please. Now, as I was previously narrating, the Doom Patrol has finally met their match, bringing themselves together in the penultimate showdown between Good and Evil, Right and Wrong, Hero and Villain, but they weren’t prepared for what Mr. Nobody had in store for them, what dastardly plan is lurking just around the corner for their inevitable defeat.
And this pretentious prick didn’t know that the Doom Patrol also came with a secret weapon of their own – me! Cue that Miley Cyrus, or acceptable knock off cover that is much more within the writer’s budget.
Just like that a man in a red and black suit comes swinging into view, riding a literal wrecking ball as he sings the song by the same name at the top of his lungs. Everyone looks stunned for a long moment, almost as though they don’t know what to do with this, because honestly who would, when confronted with the prospect, and for a long moment there’s nothing but Deadpool’s slightly off tune singing to break the likely uncomfortable silence.
“C’mon, Negative Man, I know you got some pipes in there. Or at least the guy voicing you does.” He caps his hand to one side. “Apparently they couldn’t pay Matt Bomer enough to hang out in bandages all day. Who knew?”
“Sorry,” Larry frowns from his position on the ground, still not really believing what is happening. “What?”
“Who the fuck are you?” Jane shouts from the ground, deciding to just cut right to the point already.
“Right! We haven’t officially met.” Wade hops down gracelessly from the wrecking ball, probably breaking something, but it doesn’t seem to bother him. Instead, he simply dusts off his hands and keeps going. “Hi, I’m Deadpool. You don’t know me because I don’t normally exist in this universe, but this is fanfiction. Therefore, anything is possible.”
The Doom Patrol stares. Eventually, Cliff, in his endearing Cliff way goes: “What the fuck?”
“Oh, I was also recently bought back by Disney, so this may be my last chance to swear for a very long time. All caught up now? Because I’m about ready to punch this cocksucker in a place where it really hurts.”
Everyone still looks stunned with this new information. Jane’s appearance flickers several times, almost as though she isn’t sure which personality is the best option to approach this new foe – or is it friend? The situation isn’t clear and she eventually resettles on Jane again.
“Are you fucking insane?”
“You’re one to talk. I only have one me, while you’re there hanging out with sixty four of your best friends. I’m actually kind of jealous.”
Jane looks like she’s about to strangle him, which let’s be honest is standard operating procedure for Jane.
Wait, wait, wait. Wait one goddamn minute. You think you can just … universe hop in here and save the day? You’re meat shield in godddamn Lycra! Your general modus operandi is to beat it until it stops moving. I’m practically a god! What makes you think you even stand a chance?
“Because, asshole, I happen to be the best of all you fuckers.” He points indelicately to each person he’s talking to, starting with Larry. “Adaptational attractiveness.” He switches to Jane. “With great power comes great insanity.” Vic. “Hand cannon. Though his is a little more literal.” Cliff. “Feel no pain.” Then he turns to Rita and pauses, uncertain. “Facial horror?”
“How dare you.” Rita frowns, even though she doesn’t know what that means, she can probably guess.
“Sorry, but it’s true. Anyway – I’m the entire team, all rolled in to one.”
And given that this collection of assclowns couldn’t even stop me, what makes you think you can? I’m not something you can shoot And I’m the one telling this story!
That’s what you think, fuck face. Oh yeah, that’s right. I can out meta you. Did you think you were the only one who can smash the fourth wall wide open? I don’t even have a fourth wall. Sing it with me now: I came in like a wreeeeeeeeeecking ball …
Alright, alright I get it already! What do you want?
Want? Honestly, I’m a simple guy with simple needs. I want to kill the bad guys, eat some chimichangas, and maybe convince Matt Bomer over there to help me break everyone’s brains by having the hottest sex scene of two-actual-hot-guys-in-terrible-disfiguring-makeup. I mean I think he deserves breaking that sixty year dry spell, don’t you?
There’s a long period of silence as everyone contemplated what they’ve done, including the writer. She has so, so many regrets and yet this is still happening and it’s still going to be submitted.
… This was so not what I had in mind.
Can’t always get what we want, bucko. Time to make the chimichangas.
Title: All I Wanted Was to Break Your Walls
Fandom: XMCU/Doom Patrol
Rating/Warnings: R // Spoilers for the end of Doom Patrol and warnings for Deadpool being … Deadpool, and language. Lots and lots of language.
Bonus: Yes, x2, God help me. This is what happens when you binge an entire show of crazy in one weekend.
Word Count: 914
Summary: Emily puts two fourth wall breaking characters in the same fic and tries to see if the world explodes. She definitely loses a chunk of her word count to unnecessarily appropriate coding, if nothing else.
And here we are, once again.
The heroes, in their desperate ineptitude, have come up against their arch nemesis, Mr. Nobody. Despite their inevitably lucky escape from his wrath at their last meeting –
“Escape?” Rita looks offended by the proposition as she stands in the middle of the construction zone. “We worked together, you unbelievable prick.”
– No interruptions from the peanut gallery, please. Now, as I was previously narrating, the Doom Patrol has finally met their match, bringing themselves together in the penultimate showdown between Good and Evil, Right and Wrong, Hero and Villain, but they weren’t prepared for what Mr. Nobody had in store for them, what dastardly plan is lurking just around the corner for their inevitable defeat.
And this pretentious prick didn’t know that the Doom Patrol also came with a secret weapon of their own – me! Cue that Miley Cyrus, or acceptable knock off cover that is much more within the writer’s budget.
Just like that a man in a red and black suit comes swinging into view, riding a literal wrecking ball as he sings the song by the same name at the top of his lungs. Everyone looks stunned for a long moment, almost as though they don’t know what to do with this, because honestly who would, when confronted with the prospect, and for a long moment there’s nothing but Deadpool’s slightly off tune singing to break the likely uncomfortable silence.
“C’mon, Negative Man, I know you got some pipes in there. Or at least the guy voicing you does.” He caps his hand to one side. “Apparently they couldn’t pay Matt Bomer enough to hang out in bandages all day. Who knew?”
“Sorry,” Larry frowns from his position on the ground, still not really believing what is happening. “What?”
“Who the fuck are you?” Jane shouts from the ground, deciding to just cut right to the point already.
“Right! We haven’t officially met.” Wade hops down gracelessly from the wrecking ball, probably breaking something, but it doesn’t seem to bother him. Instead, he simply dusts off his hands and keeps going. “Hi, I’m Deadpool. You don’t know me because I don’t normally exist in this universe, but this is fanfiction. Therefore, anything is possible.”
The Doom Patrol stares. Eventually, Cliff, in his endearing Cliff way goes: “What the fuck?”
“Oh, I was also recently bought back by Disney, so this may be my last chance to swear for a very long time. All caught up now? Because I’m about ready to punch this cocksucker in a place where it really hurts.”
Everyone still looks stunned with this new information. Jane’s appearance flickers several times, almost as though she isn’t sure which personality is the best option to approach this new foe – or is it friend? The situation isn’t clear and she eventually resettles on Jane again.
“Are you fucking insane?”
“You’re one to talk. I only have one me, while you’re there hanging out with sixty four of your best friends. I’m actually kind of jealous.”
Jane looks like she’s about to strangle him, which let’s be honest is standard operating procedure for Jane.
Wait, wait, wait. Wait one goddamn minute. You think you can just … universe hop in here and save the day? You’re meat shield in godddamn Lycra! Your general modus operandi is to beat it until it stops moving. I’m practically a god! What makes you think you even stand a chance?
“Because, asshole, I happen to be the best of all you fuckers.” He points indelicately to each person he’s talking to, starting with Larry. “Adaptational attractiveness.” He switches to Jane. “With great power comes great insanity.” Vic. “Hand cannon. Though his is a little more literal.” Cliff. “Feel no pain.” Then he turns to Rita and pauses, uncertain. “Facial horror?”
“How dare you.” Rita frowns, even though she doesn’t know what that means, she can probably guess.
“Sorry, but it’s true. Anyway – I’m the entire team, all rolled in to one.”
And given that this collection of assclowns couldn’t even stop me, what makes you think you can? I’m not something you can shoot And I’m the one telling this story!
That’s what you think, fuck face. Oh yeah, that’s right. I can out meta you. Did you think you were the only one who can smash the fourth wall wide open? I don’t even have a fourth wall. Sing it with me now: I came in like a wreeeeeeeeeecking ball …
Alright, alright I get it already! What do you want?
Want? Honestly, I’m a simple guy with simple needs. I want to kill the bad guys, eat some chimichangas, and maybe convince Matt Bomer over there to help me break everyone’s brains by having the hottest sex scene of two-actual-hot-guys-in-terrible-disfiguring-makeup. I mean I think he deserves breaking that sixty year dry spell, don’t you?
There’s a long period of silence as everyone contemplated what they’ve done, including the writer. She has so, so many regrets and yet this is still happening and it’s still going to be submitted.
… This was so not what I had in mind.
Can’t always get what we want, bucko. Time to make the chimichangas.
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject
no subject